this just has baby written all over it
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
