Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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