Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
