She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
