could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I looked at my own cervix.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
