GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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