A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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