so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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