When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize