She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
