OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
