I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
