no. you can't hotbox the world.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
