The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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