new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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