omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
