Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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