i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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