Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize