Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
