Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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