How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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