It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
I'm really busy with my period
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