Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
