Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I want you more than these girls want KFC
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize