I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
