I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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