Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
