Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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