yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
The air was thick with penises
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
