no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
