get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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