you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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