Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
