Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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