I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
