youre lurking in front of me
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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