Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize