Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
