ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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