Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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