I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
