He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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