dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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