my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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