i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
