Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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