Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
