i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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