he thought i was a dude.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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