operation have a gay friend backfired
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
